Dietrich's Birth Story — the mccartys

I’ve been thinking of writing out your birth story long before you were born… I mean that in the sense that there was a way that I hoped your birth would go. My first experience giving birth to Chi Hai was, overall a positive one… but after giving birth to you, well… I’ll just say that I can’t wait to give birth again. (Just take away the last two months of pregnancy… ha) I keep thinking back about the day you were born and how I just want to relive it over and over again. It was just an incredible experience and everything about it went exactly how I hoped.

My pregnancy with you was pretty much smooth sailing. I had even less morning sickness this second time around (and I didn’t have much with your sister)... and again I didn’t have any type of food aversions. I was so chill with pregnancy that I actually didn’t even see a midwife until 21 weeks! We had found out early on that you were a boy (at 9 weeks) with a blood test and an ultrasound. I wanted to hear a heartbeat before we told your sister. Your dad wanted a boy but thought you’d be a girl. I also wanted a boy and guessed you’d be a boy. Your sister wanted a sister but thought you’d be a boy. We told your sister over ice cream and the next day, when the results came over email, the three of us opened it up to find out you were a boy! We kept the surprise until Thanksgiving when we shared the news with the extended family.

As I approached the seventh month of pregnancy, I started to doubt that I’d be able to have an unmedicated birth again. The anxiety started to creep in, even though I didn’t really have any reason to believe that I was incapable. I wanted another unmedicated birth and with any luck, no stitches and hoped I’d be able to pee after giving birth. (With your sister, I was so swollen that a catheter had to be put in and we couldn’t leave the hospital until I could pee on my own.) I was so lucky to have realized that Jessica, who I met during Bible Study Fellowship, was a doula. She was truly God-sent, because I wanted someone who not only was a believer, but also a birth photographer!

Originally I wanted to have a home birth. The idea of being at home, in our own space, taking the time to labor and be in a familiar space sounded really appealing to me… but your dad didn’t think it was the best idea given our current living situation… so the next best option was a birth center. It wasn’t that I was against a hospital… it was more that I wanted to eliminate any possibility of unnecessary intervention, which dad is quick to remind me that that is the hospital’s speciality. From the get-go, I had a good feeling about Puget Sound Birth Center. Friends of friends had all said positive things about it and I’m so glad we chose to have you there. My only hesitation with this birth center was the fact that it was in Kirkland… and on a heavy traffic day, it could take about an hour to get there. I hoped and prayed you would come when there wasn’t any traffic!

Your due date was June 25th but I set my expectations low. Your sister came when I was 41+2 and every day I went past, it was pretty torturous. This time around I told friends and family you were “due” at the end of June without specifying the date. I crossed my fingers you wouldn’t be 9 days late because that would be July 4th and one, I didn’t want a July baby and two, I didn’t want you to be born on a holiday.

Weeks 32-39 of pregnancy weren’t super fun. I kept telling people I didn’t know if it’s because I was “older” or what, but I didn’t remember being this uncomfortable this early in pregnancy. This time around, I would feel bouts of sciatica pain. I usually prefer sleeping on my sides anyway, but carrying you, my hips were really uncomfortable. You could say I was ready to not be pregnant anymore. You were also such a wiggly one in the womb, which made me think you would be an active one once outside! You didn’t kick really, but just moved around a lot in sporadic bits… and now that you are 6 months, we are finding out that yes, indeed you are a very active kiddo. Toddlerhood will be fun :)

As I approached week 39, I started to feel what I could only describe as light cramping. I was definitely feeling something, but I didn’t think they could be contractions because they didn’t feel too bad. Your dad was convinced they were contractions, because I normally don’t make much of anything / I have a pretty high pain tolerance. He kept saying that you would be born that weekend. I hoped that would be the case but again, I was setting my expectations low and had it in my mind you would be born around 40 weeks.

June 18th. I had made it 39 weeks. The following day (Thursday) I started to see some light pink on my liner and got really excited! This will probably be gross to you, but let’s just normalize this here and now, I thought maybe this was the “bloody show” / mucus plug… a sign of early labor! As the day continued I saw more so it confirmed to me that you’d be here within the week of so. During that whole month, Dad was very busy with work. At one point he had scheduled three jobs the week you were supposed to come… so it was pretty miraculous he had just finished up a job that very next day.

June 20th. The day was like any other. Your sister and I were just hanging out at home. In the afternoon I drove Mia to U-Village for a friend’s birthday. Everything was pretty normal but I did feel more cramping. Again, nothing crazy but it was getting more uncomfortable. I didn’t think anything of it. Dad got home a little earlier from work that day and we were hanging out up until it was time to leave for Vietnamese class. Chi Hai had missed three weeks of class so I told Dad to go with her that evening. Dad asked if I was sure I wanted them to go, just in case of anything, but I said yes, I was sure. They would only be gone for 3ish hours… even if labor did start, it wouldn’t be that quick.

How very wrong I was!

They left for class at 5:30pm and around 6:30pm, out of nowhere my contractions started to last a minute, coming three minutes apart. I pulled up the contraction timer app and started to time them for a bit and then sent the livestream to Dad and Jessica. Dad called immediately and again asked if I wanted him to come home; the contractions seemed to be consistent but I thought it hadn’t even been an hour yet since the contractions started so surely we had some time. I had texted him earlier asking if he could pick up some Domino’s pizza that I had preordered for pick-up when they were done at 8:30pm. He made his way there to see if they could finish the order earlier for us… then Jessica called and said that the contractions seemed pretty consistent. She also wanted to hear how I was sounding… again, they were getting more uncomfortable but I could still talk through them. We decided I should call the midwives to see their thoughts.

During my last few prenatal visits, they had told me to call when the contractions were 6-8 minutes apart since it was my second pregnancy and the first went fairly quickly. I surpassed those numbers! Blake, one of my midwives, called me back after I rang the birth center and after I filled her in, she said yes, we should make our way to the birth center. How long would it be until we could get to the birth center? At this point it was about 7:30pm. I told her it’d be at least an hour. Dad was still 30 minutes away and the birth center was another 30 minutes. After I hung up with Blake, I called Dad and asked where he was. He said he had just arrived at Domino’s… should he ditch it? I said yes and he headed home.

The bags were mostly packed but while I waited for him and Libby, I tried to gather everything we needed by the door. Dad told me after the fact, that while he was driving home, he called Amy and Reid to see if they’d want our pizza since it was near their house. They weren’t home, but coincidentally were near our birth center! They were so kind enough to re-order the pizza in Kirkland for us and dropped it off. He also prepped your sister as she would also be coming to your birth, telling her that she would see me in pain, but that the pain was a good pain, that it meant my body was working to help for your arrival.

When they got home around 8pm, the first person I saw walk through the door was Chi Hai and she was all business, getting what she needed and helping to gather everything else we would need. I was really impressed! We quickly packed up and got into Dad’s car. The car seat wasn’t installed yet, but Dad figured he would figure it out afterwards at the birth center. We get into his car, but then it was overheated! Strange, since he had just been driving it, so we had to switch everything over to the van. I was laughing to myself because when your sister came, we also had to switch cars because my car had a flat tire.

The car ride up to Kirkland was smooth sailing. The biggest thing I was nervous about was traffic up the 405, because you never know… but that Friday night it was ideal. I was hoping you would come on the summer solstice and even though I didn’t get to enjoy it thoroughly, the sunset that night was cotton candy colors; I managed to poke my head up at one point on the ride up… you see, I was on all fours in the middle aisle on the floor with my elbows on the seat. Originally I was sitting, but it was way too uncomfortable. At one point, Dad told Chi Hai to take a photo of me for the memories. I’m glad she did :)

As we pull into the birth center’s parking lot around 8:40pm, I wondered to myself whether or not Amy and Reid were still in the parking lot… I found out later on that they saw us and Amy wanted to say hi, but Reid told her no haha. I wish they had! The birth center was dimly lit as we walked in, with the candle lit on the front desk. (They light it every time there is a birth happening). I walked into Room 1, which is the biggest room they had and the room I had requested, and right away I see Jessica! She too, happened to be up north that evening for another one of her client’s prenatal visits and had told me she had a feeling you’d be coming, so she had packed everything she needed already too.

I asked for a spot to lean on as I continued to work on my contractions… I was feeling really faint at this point because I hadn’t eaten dinner yet. Blake asked if I wanted my pizza so she heated up some for me. I took bites in-between contractions and sips of coconut water… At around 9:20pm, I felt my water break and soon after Blake checked to see how far along I was. 9 centimeters! I was actually shocked because the contractions never reached the “I think I need an epidural” point… Blake then asked if I’d like to get into the tub so I slowly made my way over there.

As I continued working through contractions, Blake told me to tell her when I felt a burning sensation. I still couldn’t believe we were going to meet you so soon. I think I was still in denial, even as I was breathing through the contractions. Jessica was there, gently speaking encouragement over me and snapping photos. Your dad and sister were the best “doulas”. Throughout all of it, the most helpful thing to me was a cotton pad with lavender essential oil on it under my nose. I tried the spike ball for a bit and even squeezed your sister’s hands. She was so awesome, handing me water and also encouraging me.

Finally I felt the burning sensation that Blake mentioned and started to moan, deep and low through the contractions as I began pushing. I only remember going through a handful of contractions doing this—maybe 5 or so… and it couldn’t have been more than 20 minutes. Towards the end, I could feel your head in-between me and I wanted to push you out as quickly as I could but I held you there as I waited for the next wave. It took all the control I had—instead I turned my attention to prayers for your safe arrival and our health. The next wave came, and I pushed… the contraction had ended but Blake said to keep going, you were already out… 3 centimeters, and then 4. Blake passed you up in-between my legs and I grabbed you. 10:45pm. I looked at you and the first thing I noticed were your dimples! I had prayed that I would be able to have a moment while meeting you for the first time to really take you in.

The umbilical cord was twisted around your neck so Blake told me I’d have to turn around so that we could untwist it. After we did that, I was able to lay back in the water with you on my chest. Dad, Chi Hai and I just stared at you in amazement and wonder. You were finally here.
We waited for the umbilical cord to stop pulsing and Chi Hai cut the cord! She was so brave and did an awesome job. Blake then asked if I wanted to deliver the placenta in the water or on the bed. I opted for the latter so that dad could get some skin on skin contact with you. I handed you over to him and slowly got out of the tub and made my way over to the bed. Dad was on the left side with you and I laid on the right side as Blake pushed on my uterus to get the placenta going. After it was delivered, your sister got a full tour of it! I’m still in awe that women’s bodies can create a whole new organ to sustain life.

Blake and her birth assistant, the nurse (I think her name was Rachel) left after that to give us some time to soak you in and have some family time. I couldn’t believe that after all this time you were finally here! The rest of the night went smoothly as I did have to pee pretty early on after the placenta had been delivered. I had drank so much coconut water / water during labor! Each time I stood up to pee, Blake helped me walk over and though I did feel a little weak, I was surprised that I didn’t feel any weaker. We hung out for another 2 hours or so as Blake took your measurements and I ate some more pizza. Rachel was guessing you were around 6 lbs, 12oz. She was pretty much spot on. You were 17.5 inches long and weighed in at 6 lbs, 12.5 oz… an ounce lighter than your sister. Blake went ahead and gave you an extra half ounce however, so I think your records say 6 lbs 13oz. At around 2:30am, we headed home. From start to finish, your labor and delivery was 4 ½ hours long. Born on summer solstice as I was hoping!

We named you Dietrich Ân Ðiển after the theologian Bonhoeffer and also a nod to your German background and after my late cousin Daniel whose middle name is Ân Ðiển. It’s a name we’ve had in our minds for a long time and we love that you’ll most likely never come across another Dietrich ;)

Today you are 6 months old and what a whirlwind it has been. You still don’t sleep well, but your sweet smiles and generally happy demeanor give us so much joy. You’re incredibly loved, my son. I hope and pray you always know this.

Thank you Jessica for being an incredible support and for these special photos. We will treasure them always.